Wednesday, July 9, 2008

there's no place like home

as reported by the belleville news democrat website: belleville has a socks bandit. that is a man who breaks into people's homes, skip on down to their laundry rooms, and steals women's socks.

me: i wonder if he's just part of a larger conglomerate that is anti-footwear.
myself: yeah, but he isn't stealing shoes, dingus. he's just a sicko with a thing for goldtoes.
me: peeew, you know his shoes gotta smell like play-doh and vinegar if he is anti-sock, though.
myself: that's gross. i'm done talking to you now.
me: are we still on for lunch?
myself: check in with me at 11:45. i may have a meeting.
me: way to make a committment and stick to it.
myself: just shut up already.

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