Thursday, July 31, 2008
if you grew up around the stl area, bah bah-bah bah bah buh-bah bah....
enjoy:
scrabulous' lesser known, less sexy cousin has arrived
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
guitar hero is like a defibrillator for aerosmith sales
sidebar: rumors have started that Metallica will be the next band to be honored with a dedicated guitar hero
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
icanhasforce.com, it's what you imagine it is
Monday, July 28, 2008
staying along the same theme
Friday, July 25, 2008
"the last lecture"
"Randy Pausch, a Carnegie Mellon University computer scientist whose "last lecture" about facing terminal cancer became an Internet sensation and a best-selling book, has died. He was 47."
update: so, i actually just watched the whole thing through, which i hadn't done when i posted it. it is a long video, i know. but, it's the only youtube video that has really made me think and reflect on life, and i feel good that there are educators and people like this.
spanish "artist" projects his man "power" onto buildings....for art...
ok, i just realized how this posting relates to the last posting. on that note, you know what kathleen, men are just super. who wants to see an 10 ft. peen? kathleen does.
the newest trend in oppression: men
her book, Save the Males, in a nutshell: the current culture is all about man-hate. society thinks men are pretty useless because:
- women are going off and bogarting all the parenting through single parenthood
- education has been reformed to make women happy over the past 20 years
- men are seen as criminals in family court
- being a man doesn't automatically make you honorable anymore
- they aren't women (if men aren't like us in the way they act, look, smell, etc., they are evil
now, i've hated my share of men in my time, but i think my hate is equal to my dislike of most people. my hatred knows no gender, color, religion, creed, etc. not only that, but i have a hard time thinking society* was asking for pete wentz or his large investments in urban decay cosmetics. society* definitely isn't asking to be knocked up and taken on maury povich. society* thinks Kim Basinger is just as bad a parent as Alec Baldwin. and being masculine makes you masculine, not honorable. hell, jason voorhees from friday the 13th was masculine, but "honorable" is not an adjective i'd apply to him.
is this because i made my husband wear spanx and a garter belt at our wedding? because that was TOTALLY his choice, not mine.
ugh. i think if she wants her husband or sons (she has two and that's how she got on this "stop hating men" crusade) to stop stretching out her bloomers, she should really just leave a post-it, buy some lumberjack gear, every movie sylvester stallone has made (including "stop or my mom will shoot") and call it a day.
P.S. she thinks people will have unfair assumptions about her book but "Once people actually read the book, they're surprised to see all the dots; once they connect them, they want to move Thailand." can anyone explain that to me? i mean, i love thailand, but what about burma, or even india? nepal?
*society=i/me
Thursday, July 24, 2008
bad names are fun
these kiwi's are so incapable of giving their kids names that don't suck that the government actually has to step in.
examples of government blocked names: Yeah Detroit; Stallion; Twisty Poi; Keenan Got Lucy; Sex Fruit; Fat Boy; Cinderella Beauty Blossom; Fish and Chips (twins)
examples of allowed names: Violence; Number 16 Bus Shelter; Midnight Chardonnay; Benson and Hedges (twins)
i'm all for originality, but while my husband and i decide what to name our future children, i'm automatically ruling things out, such as, "Please Beat Me Up", "Yo Mama So Fat", "Give Me All Your Crack", "Milk Eggs Bacon And Butter", "The Doctor Called At Three Fifteen And Its Not Chlamydia" and "Future Porn Star".
good thing he's an american.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Global Overpopulation Brain Snack
In 1 second: 5 babies born
2 people die
Increase of 3 humans every second.
In the same second, 1.5 acres of rainforest get cut down.
This is 250,000 people per day. Every four days a new Dallas or Detroit is added to the earth.
from Overpopulation.org:
The world population is predicted to reach the seven billion mark on Oct 18, 2012. World population hit the six billion mark in June 1999, over 3.5 times the population at the beginning of the 20th century and roughly double its size in 1960. The time for the global population to grow from 5 billion to 6 billion, a dozen years, was shorter than the interval between any of the previous billions. The population today is nearly four times the number in 1900. Behind that increase is a vast gulf in birth and death rates around the world. February 25, 2006 Indo-Asian News Service
Oct 98: The world is adding a city the size of Los Angeles every two weeks.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
People.com: R.I.P. Estelle Getty
From Golden Girls:
Sophia: I found my lucky handkerchief.
Rose: Where was it?
Sophia: It was in my bra.
Rose: What was it doing in your bra?
Sophia: I was blowing my breasts, Rose!
she will be missed.
Comic Nurse Blog: Presidential Fun Facts
- MADISON - shortest president (5' 4") but first president to wear long pants.
- ADAMS - first president photographed, had a pet alligator at the White House, swam naked in the Potomac daily, spent 17 years in Congress after his presidency.
- TYLER - first promoted vice-president (was playing marbles when he found out he was president,) first widowed in office, most kids of any president (15) Pets: horse named The General, dog named LeBeau, bird named Johhny Ty.
- *LINCOLN - first president to be (successfully) shot, first bearded president. Pets: goats named Nano and Nanko, dog named Jib, cat Bob and bird Jack.
- GARFIELD - Alexander Graham Bell came to Garfield's sickbed to try to locate an assassin's bullet in his back with a magnet. It didn't work. Could write with both hands at the same time. Could read when he was three. Only president who was a preacher. Had a dog named Veto.
- HARDING - first president to leave the country while in office, his wife burned his papers after his death. Biggest feet, a size 14.
- TRUMAN - middle initial stands for nothing due to his parents not being able to agree on his middle name. Met his wife at the age of 6 in Sunday School.
- CARTER - first president born in a hospital
there are many more facts that i didn't include, but i highly suggest you visit the site and learn more. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER. MUAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
it started with nutella, and ended with vomitting in my mouth
because women generally have great self esteem
Link to "Ugly Bag - Female"
Monday, July 21, 2008
martha stewarts approval rating went up
http://blogs1.marthastewart.com/martha/
Friday, July 18, 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
how do you convince people you're not gay?
- educating and motivating makes al reynolds want to giggle
- being referred to as "light skinned" in the south makes al reynolds want to giggle
- people thinking he's gay has deeply effected him professionally and personally...and doesn't make him want to giggle, but i can't say his "stern" face is all that intimidating
- al reynolds thinks posting a youtube video talking to what reminds me of a serial marry-er that preys on your men at bars and who just discovered coffee about how not-gay he is will help give him more credit in the eyes of the public
- al reynolds has a doctorate and that trumps any rumor that he's gay
- al reynolds REALLY, REALLY doesn't want you to think he's gay.
another reason he's not gay: he's disabled the embed and comments sections on his youtube video.
um, al? i'll believe you're southern, but i can't buy anything else you're trying to sell me. not to mention, regardless of your sexual orientation, you are just creepy. gay has nothing to do with it.
on babies.
i need to remember that right now is great for all the things i can do/continue doing that involve not being pregnant or being completely childless:
- travel: i need to go to Thailand and eat street food
- travel: i need to go back to sonoma, drink wine, and have bachelorette party II: we have no babies
- inhale chunks of blue cheese and raw fish sushi
- eat random food, no questions asked
- regularly drink beer, and the occasional shot
- sleep on my stomach
- sleep through the night
- buy clothes/shoes/handbags that i have no intention of ever using
- learn how to do the trapeze with amy
- not have pain or scarring in/around my gentle zone
- get in street fights
- curse like a drunken sailor
- get home when i feel like it
- sleep in
- eat all the cake in the house
- drink coffee like its beauty/brains tonic
- pretend to want to go on a diet
- play xbox/wii and not have to let anyone else play (except jeff, occassionally)
- quit my job (whatever job i have at that moment)
the scary thing is, i know these things and i still have baby fever.
writing this has just made me decide that i will do at least one anti-baby fever activity per day that i'm not with child. if you read this and think of anything i missed, let me know. xo
i actually think this way
sawyer: [pause and puzzled]
me: nevermind. i know.
alex p. keaton does not approve
Monday, July 14, 2008
that's a true friend that made this cake
Geeokologie: Tom Selleck Cake. a friend made this for another friend, with love, obviously. i need more friends that have some cake decorating skills.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Paying respects to Juanita Storck
Juanita Storck was a wonderful soft-spoken, gentle woman, who wanted nothing more than her families happiness. other things that made her a wonderful person:
- she would watch me before afternoon kindergarten class and make sandwiches for me (bologna and miracle whip)
- taught me how to make twine eggs for easter
- would hold me when i'd fall off my bike and start crying
- would let me stay over and watch Moonlighting with her daughters
- would make the best lemonade in the neighborhood and would let me sell it in her driveway
- would take me with her to her mothers, where i would get to eat 28-35 pieces of hard candy and caramels
- she would let me try on some of her clip on earrings
- taught me that you can clean dentures with regular bar soap
there's a million other things that made you a wonderful mother, grandmother, and caregiver, Juanita. you will be greatly missed.
there's no place like home
me: i wonder if he's just part of a larger conglomerate that is anti-footwear.
myself: yeah, but he isn't stealing shoes, dingus. he's just a sicko with a thing for goldtoes.
me: peeew, you know his shoes gotta smell like play-doh and vinegar if he is anti-sock, though.
myself: that's gross. i'm done talking to you now.
me: are we still on for lunch?
myself: check in with me at 11:45. i may have a meeting.
me: way to make a committment and stick to it.
myself: just shut up already.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
i needed content to keep adding to my blog
My review
rating: 2 of 5 stars
over over over rated. it read like a combination of R.L. Stein and Judy Blume. i admit that i got into it, but always at arm's length.
View all my reviews.
good reads told me to post my review. who am i to say no?
My review
rating: 3 of 5 stars
i can't say it was the most compelling/entertaining book i've read, but imagine if you went out for drinks with someone and they're telling you about a really embarassing situation. that's this book. it has humor, humanity, and straight up-edness about it.
View all my reviews.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
an email forwarded to me at work (from a pioneer press blog)
Parasole, the company behind multiple restaurants including the swanky Manny’s Steakhouse in Minneapolis, is no exception. Below is an excerpt from an e-mail that was forwarded to me. It contained a letter sent by Parasole to the Villager community newspaper regarding advertising the company's new Salut on Grand Avenue in St. Paul.
I’m also including the Villager’s response. Publisher Michael Mischke says he was so taken aback by the Parasole’s chutzpah, it took him three days to respond. And then they didn’t get the irony.
“Apparently it went over the rep’s head,” says Mischke, when I called to confirm that the e-mail exchange was for real.
Excerpt from Parasole's e-mail to the Villager community newspaper: We appreciate recognition as a 1st time advertiser in the publication (e.g. I'll commit to a 1/9 page advertisement however we'd like it at the 1/18 page rate). In return for the pricing Salut/Parasole will make a long term commitment e.g. (one advertisement per month for a 24 month period) for this price. We also would like a guarantee of spot color included with that pricing. We need your help on determining which is the most well read issue of the month. We also want a guarantee that we'll always be a right hand read above the fold preferably again with your help on selecting the most desirable location (we don't want to be grouped with other restaurants). Do you have dining section in the publication? Or I'd like to be placed opposite a well read column in the paper for example. I believe the addition of a Parasole restaurant will bring other restaurant advertisers to the publication. Would you send a comp copy to us also.
Villager publisher Michael Mischke’s response: I appreciate recognition as a first-time diner at Salut (e.g., I'll commit to eating dinner, however, I'd like it at half price). In return for that menu pricing, I'll make a long-term commitment (e.g.,one dinner a month for 24 months) for that price, whether or not your menu prices increase during that period. I'd also like dessert included with that pricing. I also want a guarantee that I'll be seated at a window, as far from the kitchen as possible. (And I don't want to have to be seated next to any unattractive or overly loud people.) I believe the addition of a Villager publisher will bring other diners to your restaurant. Would you send a comp dinner mint to me monthly as well? "
who's ready to set the women's movement back?
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there are so many ways this is wrong.
"Terminator Salvation", in theaters summer 2009
the description off imdb.com doesn't really help me feel one way or another about it, but i love me some christian bale. let's hope he can get the pink mole removed in his trip to the future. :)
faith in humanity, somewhat restored
knowing that the world isn't entirely full of rapists and murders, i tried to force feed myself heaping spoonfuls of light news stories: new affordable laptops being developed, Wal-Mart being forced to pay Minneosta employees for repeated labor law abuses, high school kids enthusiastic about the possibility of donating blood...these are all somewhat uplifting, or potentially distractable news articles, but they weren't helping.
what did help is reading one of my favorite blogs, Boing Boing, which has a recent post called "Where the Hell is Matt: a silly dance in 42 countries that will make you grin like a fool".
the post/video isn't groundbreaking, but it gives me that sense that the world is a much smaller, cozier place than it usually seems. all of our neighbors, whether they're three apartments below us or three thousand miles away, enjoy watching a silly dance and joining in sometimes. the smiles of so many different people of different cultures and languages really forced me to smile and all thanks to 42 countries and probably over a thousand people I'll never meet.
Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.