i'll take the drive-by special with extra fire sauce

In Butler, Missouri, Max Motor auto dealer owner Mark Muller remind me of why my parents came to America:

"We're just damn glad to live in a free country where you can have a gun if you want to."

he's so damn glad, he's practically GIVING these guns away (with purchase of a car from his dealership). of course, you could go with door #2 (a $250 gas card), but why would you. apparently, he's really giving people what they want. sales for his dealership have quadrupled and every buyer, with the exception of a canadian [insert random gay lumberjack joke here] and an old guy [insert McCain joke here], has gone with the firearms.

per the bbc article i got this information from: "He [car selling trail-blazer Mark Muller] recommends a Kel-Tec .380 pistol, which he describes as "a nice little handgun that fits in your pocket".

yes, world, all those horrible things you believe about americans is true. i'm actually typing this out with various firearms attached to each finger. i recommend the browning 9x19mm hi-power for full dexterity of your thumbs, and derringers for the pinkies.

[link to bbc article]